This sermon was given at Stevens Chapel on August 24, 2003 by Hugh Knipmeyer.

"Giving and Receiving"

This morning I would like to speak to you on two topics that are inexorably interwoven - giving and receiving. Throughout our lives, we do a great deal of both, perhaps sometimes more one than the other. Seldom do we stop to think about these two facets of life – what do we receive and what do we give. My lists will not be the same as yours, but perhaps you will find some common elements.

Let us look first at the receiving side. What do we get from others?

Very high on that list is freedom. Two hundred and twenty seven years ago a group of extraordinary men literally pledged their lives, their fortunes and their sacred honor to bring into being a form of government unseen until that time. Because of them and others who have given their lives since then, today we enjoy the priceless heritage and privilege of living as free persons.

We continue to receive the gift of those in public service who have devoted their lives to perpetrating that heritage. Curse not faceless politicians, but thank those make our governments work. Even with all of its shortcomings, we benefit from a stable and working free system.

We receive the benefits of those who have shaped our physical and intellectual world - the scientists who explore the mysteries of nature and continually ask "why?". Galileo, Newton, Einstein, Lavoisier, Woodward, Feynman - each in their own way they sought the face of God.

The practical application of pure science is the next critical step. We receive countless gifts from the technologists and engineers who have translated this scientific knowledge into everything from M&Ms to Prozac, from the telegraph to the internet and from the aspirin to the promise of stem cells. Without their talents we would be scrambling for food and looking forward to a life span of perhaps thirty-five years.

In addition to these tangible things, we enjoy the fruits of those, past and present, who have given us our store of creative treasures: a Matisse or a Van Gogh, a Mozart symphony or a Willie Nelson ballad, a Whitman poem, a "Hamlet’ or a "Death of a Salesman", an Adams biography.

The great philosophers and religious leaders - Buddha, Mohammed, Jesus, - have given us the gift of principles by which to live. Although we often neglect their guidance, their understanding of the human condition is invaluable. We as Unitarian-Universalists are most fortunate in being able to draw freely, without the constraint of dogma, on what we find meaningful from these teachers.

We enjoy the great gift of being able to think and reason. All of us have the ability to address life’s puzzles, continually to learn new things and to be creative in a myriad of ways. Indeed, this may be one of the most important gifts in that it provides each of us with intellectual challenges and the product of our reasoning often benefits others.

A special place in the pantheon of givers is reserved for those who teach. They who pass on civilization’s collective knowledge, and are paid one hundredth that of a mediocre utility infielder. These teachers deserve our gratitude for helping us to learn how to think and prepare for life.

We receive the gift given by those who have preserved out history. Without knowledge of what has gone before we would have nothing on which to build and would have little sense of identity. History is indeed both a prologue, and source of guidance. We must take the time to understand and appreciate its lessons.

A most precious gift is that of family, those relationships that are so wonderful and give us a reason to go forward. The support and love of a partner, the thrill of seeing our children grow and mature, and the joy of having the cycle repeated with our grandchildren.

All of us in this room have received the gift of this island. Do not take this blessing for granted. We are receiving the gift of those who labor here year around to provide the goods and services we enjoy – the hospital, the steamship authority, the artisans and craftsmen, Cronig’s. Curse not the traffic, but bless those who live and work here.

We here are a blessed group in an economic sense whether by our own hard work, inheritance, or just plain good fortune. We enjoy the fruits of labor of our forefathers, our co-workers and ourselves. And, of course, with that comes great responsibility.

This is, of course, only a beginning list of what we have received. Each of you has your own additions. The point is that we are the beneficiaries of many, many things, too many of which we overlook or too easily take for granted.

Having mentioned only a few of things that we receive, I would ask "is receiving a one way street or should we think also about our responsibility to give something back and should we construct our lives so that others may benefit as well"? It has been said, "it is more blessed to give than to receive". You may not care about being blessed, but you will surely feel better if you help in pulling life’s wagon

I once heard that you shouldn’t go through life with a catcher’s mitt on both hands – half of the time you need to throw the ball back

Let us look at some things you can do to repay the gifts you have received. I mentioned first our freedom. This is not a spectator sport. Be an involved and knowledgeable citizen. I am always disheartened when I hear one of my friends say "oh, I don’t follow that". Those of us here today are among the best educated and intelligent of our citizens. If we don’t actively participate in the political process, then we are failing our heritage. Understand, support and work for what you believe in - no matter what political label might be attached. When you fail to vote, you insult those who died so that you could cast that ballot.

Life is a participatory activity. I urge that you find some causes and organizations about which you feel passionately. It could be anything that you think would make a difference to your world: saving the whales, your schools, young people, art, politics – you will know when you see it. Pick a few and then really set out to make a difference in these arenas. Show that you care and willing to help and work!

Having found something that really floats your boat, work for those causes: get involved, read about it, study it, attend the meetings, stuff the envelopes, help with the fund raisers, serve on a committee, be an officer.

The island offers many of these opportunities for you to give something back to a place we love. Spend some time working at community services, the food pantry, the historical society, the boys and girls club. You will be rewarded beyond belief, and you will help to balance your personal scorecard.

Give something back to your family that they will treasure: a book you loved, discussions of current affairs, teaching them how to give back as you are doing. You are always more of role model than you realize.

Learn something new to stretch your mind. For example, are you computer literate? Can you send your grandchildren an e-mail? Today, this is a way of life for them. Give them the gift of being able to participate in that part of their world.

Here is one that costs nothing and takes less than a few seconds. It is called a "thank you" or an "atta boy". Too often, we forget to acknowledge an act of kindness or consideration or a job well done. A quick wave of thanks to someone for letting you through five corners, a brief mention to a worker to show that you appreciated some extra effort. . Recognize the volunteers in organizations. Their pay is zero, and letting them know of your appreciation will be reward enough. All of these can make someone’s day brighter.

You may note that I have not mentioned money in the giving list. Not that it is not important – it really is. However, your personal involvement is more so.

When the time does comes to share your financial resources, do so knowledgeably. Again, choose those organizations and causes about which you feel passionately, and then give enough to make a difference. The amount is truly not important as long as it is significant in your particular circumstances. Select those arenas that have given the you the intangibles you treasure and support them to help others.

What about the level of your financial support – can you make a difference? If you think your contribution may be too small I ask you to recall the story of the widow’s mite in Luke: 21

"he looked up and saw the rich putting their gifts into the treasury, and he saw a poor widow put in two copper coins. And he said "truly i tell you, this poor widow has put in more than all of them, for they all contributed out of their abundance, but she out of her poverty put in all the living that she had".

In conclusion, perhaps a short tale regarding balance in life might help. I do not know the original source, but the message, which combines golf balls and philosophy, is most apt.

A professor stood before this Philosophy 101 class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a jar of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles, of course, rolled into the open spaces between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They again agreed it was full.

The professor picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar and, of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous yes.

The professor then produced two cans of beer from under the table and proceeded to pour the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the grains of sand. The students laughed, but were puzzled.

"Now", said the professor, as the laughter subsided, "I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things - your family, your partner, your health, your children, your friends, your favorite passions - things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full."

"The pebbles are the other things that matter, like your job, your house, your investments. The sand is everything else - the small stuff, always present but not too important. If you put the sand into the jar first", he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.

The same goes for your life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out dancing. Play another 18. There will always be time to go to work, clean the house, give a dinner party and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first - the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the beer represented. The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of beers."

Giving and receiving is what life is all about. We receive the benefits of what others have done and we must reciprocate. Let it not be said when the final score is posted that "he got more than he gave".